Monday, June 30, 2014

Scary Stuff!

There's a new voice in horror! The extremely talented voice actress Laura Salonga has given life to my suspected murderess and mental patient Ms. March! She did such a good job that I got chills ... so I wanted to give her a proper shout out. 

If you want to listen to her dark stylings follow the link below to our store and click on the audio box marked, "March blurb"

Now I ask you ... is she not Hollywood's future scream queen? Another Jamie Lee Curtis in the making!

That's my side of it,

Saturday, June 28, 2014


Print problems with Amazon and Lulu. Books in print have been suspended until these can be worked out. But did you know that even if you retire a book the "broker" such as Amazon, Createspace, Lulu can still sell it? Even with mistakes?

At any rate the biggest troubles are with Diaries of the Cheshire Girls, which has 2 ISBN #'s (Think book's driver's license). It has 2. All of the e-books are fine and should be out for sale. The print books won't be for a while though. Sorry.

At any rate hubby's sick, so I'll blog properly in a day or 2. Just wanted everyone to have a heads-up.
That's my side of it,

Friday, June 27, 2014


are available through Smashwords only until further notice. Book Fair is postponed as of now as well. Stay tuned

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Interesting Show

So my women's books are all talking about empowering women. All sorts of women, but here are some real women who've been so kind to me and have truly empowered themselves:

Chicago Girlfriends is about a group of women, who have dreams, but didn’t for one reason or another pursue them at a younger age. This show will follow a group of women for one year, going after their dreams, new careers and life changing events. Viewers see the struggles and heartaches that these ladies will have to go through to get where they want to be. But, at the same time being a great support system for each other. Chicago Girlfriends will show that it is never too late to go after your dreams. No fancy houses, expensive cars, or model looking women. Just real women, with real issues, trying to make a real change, for a better life. Donation Link:"

Check them out... I think it's awesome what they're doing! 

In light of the floods I will be renting a sailboat! lol Will blog tomorrow IF we have electric!
That's my side of it,

PS If you think you can ... or you think you can't... you're probably right. What are you giving power to today? 

PPS No! I don't know why this thing changes font daily! 


Will blog tomorrow if I have not been washed away!

Tuesday, June 24, 2014


LOOK! Book 2.... this has me so hyped I might release book 3 earlier than planned! Creepy huh? This guy did the best job!

Monday, June 23, 2014

Funny repost For Susan

The thinks you never thunk you'd think....

Well good morning everyone. I was having a conversation with a dear friend of mine and she said

the silliest thing. She said and I am quoting here, “I'll have kids when I'm ready.” and I started to

laugh because trust me... mine is 23 and I'm still not ready! You aren't EVER ready to learn all of

the things kids can teach you. Am I talking spiritual, inspirational and lovely little cutesy things

they say like, “If fairies light up can we make one a night light?” NO! I am talking real kids here!

You are never ready for all the crap that they teach you because this is info you don't ever think

you'll need and then can't imagine why you do! These are things like how to explain why we don't

put peanut butter on the toilet seat! Horrid things like how to get lollipops off of the dog. You start

asking yourself ignorant questions. Crazy things you never thought you'd hear yourself think.

Things like... Why in the hell don't they make a Barbie that flushes down properly? Sickening

things like, “Why is it only the most expensive Ninja Turtle that destroys the garbage disposal?

Are the others less Ninja? And if they are Ninja why does the plumber tell me he sees them every


As a parent you are never prepared people! That's just what they tell you so that the race doesn't

end! You will inevitably end up walking around mumbling the most ignorant questions that you

really NEED the answer to. Queries such as, “Well I don't really know if my mouth would fit

around a doorknob. Can I put it on a resume?” You might even google the place where cootie

vaccinations are available. You will find yourselves just smacking yourself in the head trying to

get kid's thought to take hold... in that place where you thought you had a brain but now... dark and


People without children don't understand why we want a union! Take for example this scenario. I

was sitting with my daughter when she was a toddler with all of my friends standing around. We

were talking about how she always only asked me questions that I never had the answer to. The

conversation went something like this:

Friend 1: Oh you mean she asks about religion?

Me: No. I can answer that. These are things I can't even answer.

Friend 2: You mean where babies come from right? Nobody knows what to say.

Me: No you just don't get it. I know where babies come from. These questions are harder!

Sarah has become very quiet and all eyes turn to her. She is thinking very hard about something.

Finally I say, 'What?” She lifts her little head and looks at my friend and asks, “Does a spider have

a tongue?” Every friend I had just took off and left me there. I don't remember giving her an


So if you are a parent and you have days where you sit around with the over­whelming urge to

poke yourself in the eye repeatedly in order to let the stupid out... be comforted. You are still

incredibly intelligent. (It's just that now you have kids and so nobody remembers it any more.)

And if you are not a parent do an act of kindness today for someone who is. And by that I mean...

buy us a text book on astrophysics so that our friends will come back and we can once more talk in

full sentences that don't rhyme! PLEASE!

That's my side of it,


PS Does a spider have a tongue?

Sunday, June 22, 2014


In the Land of Far and Away a lovely Fuzzles named Whatzit planned for a very big event! Today was his birthday! He had invited all the other Fuzzles who, like him had the magical power of changing colors.

His Momma Fuzzles had invited his other friends like Wherezit and Lovezit! He was so happy. For like every little Fuzzle he had high hopes for his birthday.

His expectations were very high indeed. That however, had less to do with seeing his friends than it did with his birthday present. You see, he had wished a wish so grand, that it was very unlikely that he might receive such a thing. Why, the night before he had told the Grandmother Wind of his one wish.

Grandmother Wind, he had said, I should very much like my heart's deepest desire!

Ah, child, what do you suppose that might be?

That's just the thing, Grandmother! I don't know,replied Whatzits.

Then child, how do you know that you don't already have it?

I don't know. I think if I had it I would know it already and be happy every moment!

This is an excerpt from the childrens book, Whatzit's Wish a new book I have coming out soon. I bet you're wondering why there are different colors in the text huh? Each color is a skill for parents and kids to work on together. Each book has different skills to help your child master as you go along. 

(Please excuse any misspellings in my blogs lately. I write so much that I have actually rubbed all the letters off the keyboard. The books are edited so don't worry! lol)

That's my side of it,

Saturday, June 21, 2014

Coming soon

Coming soon ... to birthdays near you! 

Tomorrow an excerpt from this book!

Friday, June 20, 2014


Okay dude, What's up?

Let me tell you that if you've decided to start a publishing company ... you might want to think twice. It's much harder to format a book than it is to animate a cartoon the old fashioned way. think about how a print book is made and you'll understand. A page on the right has to be aligned in a separate manner than a page on the left or you won't be able to open the book and read it.  That means that every other page of a print book is set up with an opposite margin because with out a "gutter" all your words will not be legible. That alone can make you want to yank your hair out.  Don't even get  me started on text wrap and childrens books.

Any way, our little publishing house is going to have another children's book coming out this week. Also in order to kickstart some funds I am doing readings for birthday parties in which the birthday boy / girl gets a reading, copy of an autographed book and a box of party favors and fun promos that are just theirs. This deal is safer than a bounce house but it of course can only be made available to the San Antonio area.

More exciting news is I am close to having an official house launch. If I can swing it I'm going to arrange a small book fair in a book store here. It will be affiliated with other publishers, but even if small you guys know I can throw an amazing event! So grab a book and let's party!

That's my side of it,

Thursday, June 19, 2014

another first

Well 2 actually. My book Diary of the Cheshire Girls is now competing in the Bowker's Shelf Unbound book contest! Wish us all at Cheshire Grin Publishing lots of luck. We all worked double. doubles to get it out there for you!

Okay so the other first is ... our very first Cheshire Grin Publishing business meeting! I'm actually flustered. Very excited though!

OH wait, one more... today is the first time I try to shop in a store without my cane! Scary!

That's my side of it,

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Bad Medicine

So … I've been sick this whole week. I really apologize for not being here. Anyway yesterday I went to the doctor and guess what? I'm not going to be catatonic soon. Yet with such great news you'd think I'd be jumping for joy. But I am very angry. Why? Because it's a common habit for doctors to simply read the results that a tech writes down.
Yesterday a competent doctor, which I am now convinced there are very few, actually looked for himself. The reason I can't move my neck has nothing to do with my srynx... it hasn't changed in years. Truth is the reason my neck is destroyed, arthritis has entirely eaten it away in 4 places. It's gone and can't be fixed. Me the no-necked-wonder will now have to go to extensive physical therapy just to be able to move … over something that could have been slowed to a crawl had any of my previous doctors bothered to read their test results by looking at the pictures they took. Really?
I've had arthritis since third grade but the pain is different in a spine because the tissue and muscles are different and will continuously spasm. I ought to sue. I know this is truly a miracle, I will be more able to be grateful once this truth actually hits me. Stay tuned … more books on the way. Also submissions are open for a small window yet. I really need fantasy, middle grade readers and picture books (including coffee table books such as photo-journals and of course graphic novels.)

That's my side of it,

Tuesday, June 17, 2014


I'll blog tomorrow when I'm not pissed at doctors. Too angry to think straight. Check out the streetlighthalo site... new resource. Catch you tomorrow.

Saturday, June 14, 2014


If you ever decide to mow your grass with a weed whacker in order to build strength in your legs and back, a word of advice... DON'T!

Friday, June 13, 2014

ATTN Writers and Artists

Submissions are open... any genre but erotica. Read guidelines first!

Send your query to:

PS. Your query doesn't have to be formal 2 paragraphs about your book, word count and genre is fine.

Thursday, June 12, 2014


lol! Here is a funny video I had made for my daughter's birthday. I used to tease her like this endlessly! Now she has a press conference to prove I'm not all here! enjoy!

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Will have to blog tomorrow... sinus headache! OUCH!

Tuesday, June 10, 2014


So international commercials and some talk shows and pod stations, month runs here and there. Also working on another ad, two actually as budget allows. But that is NOT the most exciting news!

I am on top of the world, as they say! The book signing at THE store was the most awesome thing I ever experienced! The people were so kind! The store was packed ... especially for it being a Tuesday. There was a lull in crowds for only about 30 min. all day! The people loved me. I may have only sold 2 books but I made a lot of important connections.... including... wait for it....

the grand parents of a little boy who is trying to start a literacy campaign in his school. (AWWWW! Doesn't that just melt your heart?) Anyho, everyone thinks it's a great idea, but of course nobody wants to donate to his cause. Well it just so happens that HEB, if you remember donated 3 huge boxes of books to our literacy fest at Erin Go Bragh, and we sent most to the homeless shelter after. They however sent so many it took 2 vans to get them all there. Well we had half a box left … you think that's not much? Think laundry hamper over-flowing. Yeah! That's how much our green grocer thinks of kids! HOORAY!

So hey, I won't be getting back to the shelters until Christmas so I thought … they were meant to educate. Let's educate! I am giving this little boy the lot. I am doing it because in my eyes he is a true hero!

I made a thousand business connections too. Most kids aged for the book couldn't buy but were aspiring writers looking for direction. It was awesome that people still care about writing. They all asked very intelligent questions! Very proud to be alive today!

I met lots of other writers, a zillion little kids, graphic artist/illustrators, lots of connections... and lots of business types that might be helpful as we tread this literary quest... but I have to say that the high point of all of it was a little boy who loved others enough to reach beyond his own desires and extent his hand to his classmates so that they would be able to read too! Young sir, if you are reading this … hold your head high. To everyone out there... keep an eye on him... he will do great and noble acts in this world!
That's my side of it,

PS> They invited us back!

Monday, June 9, 2014

Honey Moon 2

Well I had the best time in so far as company. My husband not so much. He took me to the finest restaurant in town and the food was almost literally to die for, as I had an allergic reaction and had to break out the epi-penn. Sadly a side-effect is flopping around like a dead fish. I'm pretty sure convulsions on the lawn was never his idea of sexy. lol

I'm fine now. He was so charming and sweet, spoiled me beyond my wildest dreams. There will never be another in my life. I need look no further. I have found perfection. (MUSH) lol... you asked? No I just felt like bragging!

Okay so getting ready for the book signing tomorrow. This one could make or break me as Broadway half-price is the store every author dreams of here. I could very easily destroy my career there if I screw up so.... no pressure! lol

I think we're ready. i even have e-book envelopes with e-book download codes in them. So if you're not a troubled teen, but a housewife, mom or just like a good adult drama, I'll be able to sell you those too.

In addition we'll be introducing our whatzit's line to kids in so far as free balloons, stickers and magnets. As always the lovely Sarah will be handing these out to all our little friends. AND if your child has a birthday coming up... we have a party package that we'll be handing out there.

See you on Broadway at noon!

That's my side of it,

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Writing jokes repost

I was talking to a writing friend last night and also another one today and they've made me realize how lonely it really is to be a writer. It sort of is you know.... writing the book is the easy part. Then comes promotion. You know book launches and promos and intense internet time building a fan-base, blogging, tweeting or what have you. Spouses and families tend to feel left out and it causes such drama in happy home after a while. But don't get all glum, I'll try my best to keep the mood light tonight, what with it being the holidays and everyone being stressed.

So here's a fun fact about a writer, someone you might have heard of a guy I like to call Shakespeare. TRUTH Shakespeare left his wife and his son Hamlet to pursue a writing career years before he met his African/Jewish mistress for which Othello was written. Now we all know that this is a fact, we learned it in English Comp and also history. But what if it had happened today? Let's have a peek at that scenario.

William S : I have left mine wife to play with puns and the craft of words because my agent said it was best for mine career. Besides she was overly scorned amongst all mine time on Fate Book and mine book launch at Barnes & Noblemen.

Desdemona: She is a right harlot and canst not understand thee as I canst.

William S: Aye! There's the rub; whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows....

Desdemona: Oh what the hell art thou talking about now? Can't thou speak English?

Imagine also just the long talk with an editor that Mark Twain would have now:

Editor: We can't have this character in Tom Sawyer being an actual … well his grammar.... it isn't educated you see. We'll be liable.

Mark T: But he isn't supposed to be educated. He's an ex-slave.

Editor: Well the entire slavery thing is just really offensive and oppressive. You'll have to change that you see.

Mark T: . Hence the lack of education

Editor: We don't want to portray people as ignorant. This'll have to be edited out. Simply change that character and then it'll be perfect!

Mark T: Change him to what?

Editor: We were thinking a middle-aged accountant in Boise, Idaho would work better.

Imagine George Orwell trying to submit his book 1984 to a publishing house now. What might their response be?

Dear Mr. Orwell,
Thank you for submitting your work to our house. We will not however be interested in your manuscript at this time. A good critique would be of service to you as we find the term Big Brother to be sexist. Any woman can be just as iron-fisted as a man and just as ferociously uncaring (but at only half the pay.) Also it is politically incorrect to point out anyone's gender, totalitarianism dictatorship or not. That kind of behavior is not only gender-insensitive, it also we tend to find evokes feelings of sadness and fear, whereas we want monotone feelings of inspiration for all equally.

Thank you for your submission and best of luck in your future publishing ventures.

PS. We also feel your title 1984 is not only out-dated but makes the other calendar years feel “left out,” which is not something we want to do to our demographics.

That's my side of it,


Friday, June 6, 2014

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

The Handy Dandy, Nifty, Swifty, Portable, Mobile, Computer- Compatible, Fix-it-all, One-of-a-kind, Whatchamacallit, Thingamabobby

The Handy Dandy, Nifty, Swifty, Portable, Mobile, Computer- Compatible, Fix-it-all, One-of-a-kind, Whatchamacallit, Thingamabobby

It will fix everything in your life … instantly and keep it fixed permanently! No price is too high, Ladies and Germs, but today only you'll get it for the basement bargain price of just 50 affordable payments of $29.95!

But wait... there's more. If you order now you'll also get to see the world renown Barnum and Bailey egress at no extra cost to you!

It is the way that ads are worded that sell the toothpaste, even when the toothpaste is basically shitty. Now what has put me in such a strange mood this morning? One of my sisters called last night upset once more over that, “TOXIC” friend. It reminded me once again of the famous circus egress attraction that founded a veritable brightly-colored cash cow.

When the circus was still in its infancy Barnum, had an awesome idea. Since people paid mostly for the freak-shows, but instead of looking and moving on the three-rings were not enough to move customers through and so the first crowd you got was about the only crowd you got … which costs a lot of money.

He posted a sign for his new attraction. This way to see the egress. Like he said, “there's one born every minute.” He was right. No one knew what an egress was, but they were quite certain they'd never seen one. They would rush through the displays hurrying quickly to see that last, big thrill only to find out that egress means exit.

Why did this work? Is it because people are stupid? No, there were dictionaries back then. This worked because people are lazy … most people even given the chance wouldn't have bothered to walk all the way to the book shelf, pick up the dictionary and look it up. People don't want work. People want instant gratification. Sadly, there really is no such thing. In order to learn we have to put in effort and the same thing goes for getting proactive and changing a life.

That one friend who calls repeatedly about the same issue is only calling you so that you will excuse them from blame, responsibility and work. They want you to say, “It's not your fault! He's the bastard and you're nice!” Hence their life becomes his … and ultimately your responsibility. If you were to say, “Well get a divorce,” that person wouldn't call. Instead they would think, “Well then I have to get a lawyer and that could involve, God, I dunno how many phone books!”

People buy the crappy toothpaste because a whiter smile will fix it all. People buy implants because larger boobs will fix their life and maybe even stop a war! I'm sorry... it won't.

In AA we say, “If you want what we have,” and lots of people rise. When we add the part, “And are willing to go to any lengths to get it,” most people sit back down. The simple thought of how many flaws we have that we need to change is over-whelming.

I guess in short, what I am saying is … if you attract people that are dying of thirst, it's probably because you have water. But if those people aren't willing to dig the well then they'll be back the next time they're thirsty. On that note, I think the next time I encounter someone who won't stop whining but isn't willing to work towards any change, I'm just going to hand them a tube of crappy toothpaste.

That's my side of it,

Tuesday, June 3, 2014


I've been gone a couple of days for family days! Also this weekend is a possible trip to Austin. Next week is my 2nd Wedding Anniversary! So I'll be scarce to find for a week or so. Sorry.

I have been learning how to format books for weeks. LOL It's not easy and also it's tedious. I want to be able to save $ on my little house so that I won't be able to take only one kind of book/writer.

OH WAIT... did I say a third book? Might not be what you expected but...

You will have to open an account but they have a lot of free books too.
This is only the ebook... we'll find a good fit for my children's book in print as soon as we're able. I'm pretty certain I want it to be all paper like Where the Wild Things Are and the Serendipity books, rather than a regular paperback. Until we can decide it'll be an e-book.

You can check out reviews of all my books...

That's my side of it,