the What If

My gorgeous daughter and I were having another heart to heart as we tend to do that almost every day. She was very down as soon she will enter college and the fear has wrapped itself around her. Here's what was said as closely as a 1 in the morning conversation can be remembered.

Sarah: I'll have to work, go to school, clean the house and every year it'll get worse. I will never have fun again. It's all toil forever.

Me: People figure out how to do it little by little. So what makes you think that you have to figure it out all at once?

Sarah: All my friends are and they have kids even.

I never get preachy on here. I am not trying to now either. I just want to lead you to the place we got in the conversation and what I thought. Even as a Pagan I still believe in the Bible and use it for reference often. So here goes:

M: Would you say that stealing was a sin Sarah?

S: Yes.

M: Okay why?

S: Cuz you took my stuff and you didn't work for it so it's a piss off.

M: Okay well would you say that murder is a sin?

S: Yes!

M: Why?

S: Because you hurt people and everyone is hurt... like forever.

M: Okay well I could argue effectively that the same goes for stealing if we take into account economy and slave labor. But I am taking it that you feel that murder is a bigger deal than say... stealing or I dunno lying. Right? So what makes one bigger than the other? They both do harm.

S: True mom but no one dies.

M: Not necessarily true yet if someone says, “In high school I stole” you will probably get over it. Where as if someone says, “At 12 I was a child predator even if you don't have kids you are grabbing your knife. Why is that when they are both wrong?

S: Because one is worse than the other.

M: True! And so that justifies stealing right? Because other people are doing worse?

S: NO. I kinda see what you mean?

M: Why does the Bible say Thou shalt not covet Sarah?

S: Okay mom you lost me. Because.... then you steal other people's shit?

M: Maybe.... but what if it's because when you compare yourself to other people you don't get the correct results. There will always be someone better out there and someone worse... yet in God's eyes we are equal. That's because He can see what we can't. How do you know that guy who has it all, has his head on his shoulders, handles everything gracefully and can accomplish it all doesn't wake up at night screaming with horrible fear, anger or whatever from the hole in his soul? You don't. So if you shouldn't compare your possessions should you really compare accomplishments? When most of our accomplishments in the space of a day aren't even written down on paper? You don't covet because you will never do the math right. That is why nobody ever says, “Please Sarah today I would like you to go and count everyone else's blessings and you'll feel better.

The truth of the matter is not only that the grass is always greener but also that if I'm minding everyone else's yard then all my plants are dying. If I look at what other people can do I will never find the gifts that I myself have. I will never be able to enjoy one single moment of my life.... because what I see as something that will cure all might be the bane of another person's life. If I want to be happy in my life I have to deal with my life, not my friend's, not my mentor's not my mom's or my teacher's or even Donald Trump's. Happiness is found... true happiness is found by working on myself, keeping my focus on what I can do and not worrying what the “Kool kids” can do. Trust me guys... even the kool kids still have something they wish they'd done differently!

That's my side of it,

Angel

www.streetlighthalo.com